Hello. It's been a little bit. Life, you know.

Today I've been reflecting on forgiveness. We'll get back to that.

I have always been a bit sassy and independent with an extreme hunger for justice. In every encounter. With every person. I remember in Junior High writing a letter with a friend to her dad detailing our side of an argument and really feeling at the end of it that there was no way he could say no. I was born to be a lawyer.

Since then a lot of tough things have happened. Things that have upended my world and dulled my sense of resolve. Shrunk my confidence. But the one thing that remains like an unquenchable, at times out-of-control fire is the innate need for justice to prevail. For people to right their wrongs, apologize, make amends, ask for forgiveness, forgive, do right by other people.

At the end of the day I'm only in charge of my own actions. I cannot make anyone do what I want the to do, even when what I want them to do might also be the right thing. Back to forgiveness. It's the one thing I can use my agency to do when someone hurts me. It's the thing I can do when someone goes out of their way to make my life more difficult. When someone is entirely self-unaware (you know, the opposite of self-aware) or ignorant or just too self-involved to notice how their actions might be harming me.

Life is hard. We are all imperfect. We all struggle. But we also ALL have the power to be kind to one another. To do good. To let things go. If we aren't able to move past the little things, what happens to our lives when the REALLY big and painful things hit? It takes so much energy and focus, but changing how we respond and even our "go-to" thoughts about a person or action can happen through consistent, repeated self-talk. You heard me right - talking to ourselves is not necessarily a bad thing. I know from personal experience that bitterness, anger, envy and anxiety are the poison I drink into my own body hoping it'll affect another person. What a waste of time. What a lousy expenditure of one moment of this beautiful gift I've been given. I can love and forgive those who hurt me. I have to in order to create my own happiness.

xoxo